Ayesha Hassan

“When Women Judge Women” At the heart of who I am, are three extraordinary women: my mother, my Nano, and my Pova. Each of them has faced immense challenges and emotional pain, yet they never let bitterness take root. Instead, they chose love, understanding, and unwavering support. My mother taught me quiet strength and self-respect, while my nano and pova’s warmth, prayers, and unconditional care made me feel deeply grounded. In Pakistan, women grow up navigating a world shaped by traditions, expectations, and inherited fears. In conversations about patriarchy in Pakistan, the focus almost always rests on men. While men undeniably benefit most from the system, the truth is more complicated and more uncomfortable. Patriarchy does not survive on men alone. It is often protected, justified, and passed down by women themselves. This is not an accusation. It is an observation rooted in daily life. In many households, women speak about other women in front of their husbands in ways they would never tolerate for themselves. A woman’s character, clothes, marriage, or independence becomes casual conversation often wrapped in mockery, suspicion, or moral judgment. She may think she is protecting her position but in reality, she is normalizing misogyny inside her own home. In many families, sons are protected from accountability in ways daughters never are. Boys are excused for anger, entitlement, and disrespect, while girls are trained to be patient, polite, and accommodating. Some mothers teach their sons that responsibility, emotional sensitivity, or respect for a wife will make them “weak” or “fragile.” Phrases like: “Don’t listen too much to your wife.”  “Men don’t apologize.”  “If you’re too loving, she’ll control you.”  “Never ever cry, especially in front of a woman”. Toxic masculinity does not appear overnight. It is nurtured in living rooms, reinforced at dinner tables, and excused in childhood. When a boy is never taught to clean up after himself, regulate his emotions, or respect women’s boundaries, he grows into a man who expects service instead of partnership. When his anger is defended and his behavior justified, he learns that women will always be responsible for fixing him. This does not mean mothers are villains. Many women raise sons the way they were taught within systems that punished them for doing otherwise. But acknowledging structural pressure does not erase responsibility. If women are trusted to raise daughters with discipline, dignity, and morality, then they are equally capable of raising sons with empathy, accountability, and respect. I try to carry this forward in my life by: ● Asking women how their day went and genuinely listening. These simple acts create safe spaces where women feel seen, valued, and empowered. They replace judgment and competition with empathy and encouragement. ● Celebrating their small joys, choices, and achievements. ● Acknowledging challenges and reminding them of the people they love. Every word, every action, every small choice matters. Women Lifting Women Hands that lift, hearts that care, Voices that cheer, always there. Strength in kindness, love that frees, Together we rise, like roots and trees. “So let’s rise, lift each other, and make every woman feel seen, valued, and strong. Leave a Reply Cancel Reply Logged in as admin. Edit your profile. Log out? Required fields are marked * Message*

“Behind Every Strong Mother Is a Story No One Asked: Menopause Needs a Voice” Growing up, I was always close to the women in my family, my mother, my aunts, and even my grandmother. I saw their strength, their dedication, and the way they held our families together. But as I grew older, I also began to notice something else: they were going through changes that no one talked about. That silence is what made me look closer. And what I found changed the way I see women’s health forever. “Behind Every Strong Mother Is a Story No One Asked: Menopause Needs a Voice” In many cultures especially in Pakistan menopause is often treated like something women should “just bear.” Talking about pain, mood changes, exhaustion, dizziness, or cramps feels shameful. Even in loving families, many mothers don’t feel comfortable sharing what they’re going through. Because of this silence, many women face severe symptoms that go unnoticed, their emotional well-being begins to suffer, and they often feel isolated during one of the hardest phases of their lives. Families may misunderstand their mood swings or fatigue, assuming it’s irritation or stress rather than a natural hormonal transition. Husbands and children, unaware of what menopause truly brings, often misinterpret their struggles, leaving women to carry an invisible burden entirely on their own. When I saw my mother and my aunts going through these changes, I wanted to help. I started reading, researching, and learning and that’s when I discovered how much I didn’t know before. I learned about the Estrogen drop — the major hormonal shift that causes many emotional and physical symptoms, Muscle loss — why strength decreases during menopause, Bone density changes — leading to higher risks of arthritis and osteoporosis, Sleep problems — why many women feel exhausted, Severe cramps or pelvic pain, Mood fluctuations — not because they are “emotional,” but because their bodies are transforming and the importance of screenings like uterus scans, breast exams, and checking for fibroids. A Daughter’s Role: One day I decided to take a step for my mother. I asked her to visit the doctor. I encouraged her to get her checkups – uterus, breast, fibroids, everything. I helped her understand what was happening. And slowly, I saw a change. She wasn’t just healing physically; she started to feel supported. She laughed more. She shared more. She trusted the process. How You Can Support: Here are simple ways to make a real difference: ask her how she’s feeling with gentle, non judgmental concern, go with her to a doctor if she feels nervous, encourage regular checkups for her uterus, breasts, and bone density, learn basic menopause symptoms and talk about them openly, be patient with any changes in her mood or energy, offer emotional support because sometimes listening is enough, and create a safe environment where she never feels ashamed of what she’s experiencing. As daughters, sons, and young members of society, we have the power to break this cycle of silence. Let’s start the conversation. Let’s normalize women’s health. PERIOD ! Leave a Reply Cancel Reply Logged in as admin. Edit your profile. Log out? Required fields are marked * Message*